Well once again The Apprentice has featured an episode centered around designing an ad campaign for a product, and the results were about the same as previous attempts. Some good, but mostly bad. The 2 teams had to shoot a 30-second TV ad, and an ad campaign to (supposedly) support it. The men had a terribly boring commercial, where an older Lamborghini (Countach?) was shown driving down the street, then it morphs into the new Lamborghini (Gallardo?). First, the ‘morph’ looked pretty weak, and if you are going to do a commercial for an extraordinary car like a Lamborghini, why have such an ordinary shot as a car driving down the street? Use a shot that shows action and power…..like have the camera start by focusing in on the rear bumper as the driver revs the engine…..exhaust pipe jumps, then the car takes off squealing tires, the smoke from the tires covers up the camera, you hear the car getting further away, then you hear tires squeal again, now you hear the car getting closer, then it flies back through the smoke screen it created when it took off. The print ads from the guys weren’t much better, but at LEAST they had a pseudo-campaign at work. Granted the different colors theme was pretty boring (Loved how Chris, the project leader, said at the start that you never use clichés in advertising, then one of his print ads was a green Gallardo with the tagline ‘Green with envy.’), but at least the concept of a campaign was there. However I didn’t see the connection from the commercial to the print ads. What about using the above commercial, then for the print ads, have a guy standing there in a cloud of smoke with the tagline ‘We’d love to show you the new Lamborghini Gallardo, but you’re 0.43 seconds too late’, or what about a shot of a Gallardo with the tagline ‘Want to see the new Lamborghini Gallardo go from 0 to 60? You’ve got 4.1 seconds to decide’. Anything that gives a sense of power and motion. ‘Green with envy’. Snicker. The funniest part is, didn’t the Dodge Neon do almost that exact ad a few years ago? Or maybe it was the Beetle. I will say this for the guys, Chris, the Project Leader, did at least tell his team to go into the meeting with Lamborghini with no preconceived notions about what they should do, but just listen to what their clients want. Course they still lost. The women did a bit better, but not by much. The commercial did at least inspire some emotion, although as Caroline pointed out it seemed to be a bit of a hodge-podge. They showed shots of the car, engine, mixed with ‘Are you worthy’, ‘Do you want permission?’, and a couple others that was all I remember. Not great, but a helluva lot better than showing an overhead shot of a Lambo driving down the street. The print ad campaign…..I have no idea, I don’t think they showed it. If you missed tonight’s episode, it will be replayed tomorrow night on CNBC at 7pm CST.

I’ll admit it, I was hooked on The Apprentice during the first season. I started watching the second season, and decided to stick it out even though the first season was clearly more entertaining. I tried watching the first episode of the third season, and left it halfway through to switch to Tilt, and have never been back. But tonight I’ll check back in as the teams will work with The Kaplan Thaler Group, Ltd. to create a print campaign and 30-second tv spot for Lamborghini. In past seasons, the teams have worked with Deutsch to create campaigns for the Marquis Jet Card, and Levis to create an in-store catalog, in both cases with mixed results. Somehow I’m betting it’s more of the same from tonight’s efforts.

if you don’t get arrested. Given the crack-down on subway terrorism, this isn’t something I’d recommend trying at home. However, if you can manage to get permission, it would make for a hell of a buzz campaign as a media placement. Try your own subway film strip.

Intelligent Energy, less than intelligent phone number. Some brilliant marketer at Intelligent Energy chose a phone number without fully considering its meaning. Now it’s being spouted across cartoon hour on network television (don’t ask how I know that). For more information, call 1-877-Ive-Got-Gas.

I am thinking about quiting work, or working a lower paying job. It does not make sense to make more money, it only hurts yourself…… Example - I was driving the other day, and I saw these wonderful new homes being built in my hometown. I am talking two-car garage, yards, two story, single family homes. Brand new construction. Not in the greatest neighborhoods, but areas where it is still safe. So I called the phone number, and was told that there were homes available, and they were selling for $65,000. 65K! I was excited beyond believe. In Maryland, you cannot by an outhouse for $65,000. Not even a townhouse or a condo….so 65K through me off my rocker. So I made an appointment with my wife, and we were ready to sign right there on the spot……then they asked us, what is your combined monthly gross income? We both put out our chests and states XX dollars, my good man, thinking he would be so impressed with our status in society. That is when reality set in…..he said these units were set aside and built with taxpayer money for people with lower incomes, under 25k per couple. WHAT the &^%* we thought. Crazy! Absurd! WHAT! I completely understand providing housing for people with low incomes, but these seems almost like a reward for being lazy, or a reward for not working hard. A couple not making 25K? You better be disabled or elderly….. But they were not. When we drove past the other units, there were Lexus’ in the driveway, and Direct TV on the roofs. How can you afford a lexus and direct TV and make that much? Our government is rewarding drug dealers and pimps with single family homes, while the middle class has had to deal with 40% appreciation values in homes. What about us? The 60% that pay the most taxes, who elect officials, and who are the backbone of America? What do we get…..ohh, a $250 tax credit. Not to be bitter, but that is wrong. One of the saddest things I have ever done was turn down a contract offer on our home sale to a single teacher/mother because her bid was not high enough on my 2 bedroom townhome…..and she bid $245,000. A woman who gets up everyday to teach children, the children of “lower” income people, cannot afford to live in a house. I think it is time the market corrects itself in the housing sector, so professionals can afford to live as good as those under the poverty line. I am up to two lattes a day. Add in a couple of smokes, and I am becoming a real liability to my Life Insurance Policy. JK

It was SpikeTV vs World Wresting Entertainment CEO Vince McMahon in a best of 3 falls match on Monday night, and SpikeTV got the 3rd and final pin. The WWE’s RAW wrestling show ended its run on SpikeTV monday night, and will be moving to the USA Network on October 3rd. RAW, which is aired live, opened with the flamboyant McMahon announcing to the crowd that this was the last episode of RAW to appear on SpikeTV, and that starting on October 3rd, Raw would be carried by USA. Shrewd move Vince, but his attempt to get in some free advertising backfired when Spike censored the portion of the speech where he mentioned moving to USA. Apparently WWE’s production staff caught wind of this, because later in the show the announcers mentioned RAW going to the USA network so frequently that Spike couldn’t censor them. Spike had the last laugh, when they aired commercials for their ‘Ultimate Fight Night’ programming, which will replace RAW, as being “real fights” with “no scripts”. The real question is, was Spike already planning on running these ads as a parting shot at the WWE, or did they add them on the fly in response to the WWE’s attempted slight? Odds are it was the former. To add insult to injury for the WWE, Monday Night Football, which airs opposite RAW on ABC, was opened by former WWE champ The Rock.

I have to admit. When I first took a look at the agenda for Advertising Week, it really struck me as yet another opportunity for the industry big guys to pat themselves on the back. I was a little dismayed at the lack of activities for those of us with less than six figure salaries. Heck, would it have been that hard to organize a portfolio review, or even just a Jr. oriented panel discussion?

All that being said, I attended a discussion this afternoon entitled “New Kids on the Block” which focused on the models behind three small new agencies here in New York: Taxi, StrawberryFrog, and Anomaly. (I’m going to assume that the powers-that-be were simply oblivious to the title reference.) Something interesting has to come out when you take the top dogs from three of the hot new shops in town and stick them all behind one table.

And it did. The discussion began with a simple overview of the three agencies presented by their respective personnel: Paul Lavoie from Taxi, Scott Goodson from StrawberryFrog, and Jason DeLand from Anomaly (Ernest Lupinacci who was originally scheduled as the speaker was called out of town). These three agencies were chosen because: they are each newcomers to the NY scene; they are each small, nimble offices of 20-30 people; and they’re all out to change the world.

During these descriptions, it became quite clear that each of these agencies is designed around the notion that advertising needs to change. Lavoie, Goodson, and DeLand each had something to say about the dinosaur agencies of the days of yore…and why they’re heading toward extinction. And each is operating their new agency around the concept that advertising isn’t just that anymore. Gone are the days when an ad happens on a piece of paper or a 30 second television spot.

I think perhaps Scott Goodson’s description of StrawberryFrog’s goals sums it up the best: these agencies are in the business of “sparking cultural movements for specific brands.” It almost seems that term “advertising agency” itself should fall by the wayside. These shops are so much more. They’re idea shops. You want the interior of your new retail store designed? No problem. Don’t know what to name it? We can help. Need ads to go with that? Don’t sweat it.

Ladies and Gentlemen, welcome to the new age of “advertising”.

As an Account Manager, I respond to a lot of RFP’s. I have to say, there is an alarming trend of RFP’s that come in that say, “we request the actual media invoinces, and refuse to pay media commissions” This is an alarming trend for those smaller agencies that rely on media commissions for their profit…….. Just an FYI - Media Commissions are fading fast, you heard it here first. Next topic, how can we make a profit without the 15% this industry was established on….. JK

I hate when a marketing promotion works on me…….since I work in the business, I feel I cannot be trapped by any marketing guru. There is a promotion in Western PA that has captured me, as well as a bunch of others. It’s called Fuel Perks by Giant Eagle grocery stores. For every $50 you spend at the Eagle, you get .10 off per gallon of gas at their Get Go stations. So, if I spend $200 bucks in October, I get .40 off per gallon…….What a great deal. I have no choice but to shop there, as it cost me $40 bucks to fill my Mazda Protege at $3.19 a gallon. With the perks, I filled up for a lean $25.00. I clearly realize the promotion…..by taking advantage of the gas, I am ensuring them of being loyal and shopping only there. Sure, their prices may be higher, but with gas as high as it is, it makes sense. Like it or not, I will spend $200 in that store for a year at least. And now that I am there, companies are going to have to spend a lot more to break that loyalty. It is a great promotional tie in. I think promotions like these are going to be key to compnaies in the next few years as they try and create brand loyalty. Brand loyalty, for me anyways, is non-existant. Do I shop at Lowe’s or HD? Whichever one is closer. Do I use Tide or Arm & Hammer? Which ever one is on sale. Baby Boomers, even Xers, are known to be loyal, but I am a Y, and I am not loyal to anything. These are the cars I have purchased VW Jetta Honda Civic Honda Civic Mazda Protege What is my next car? Who knows. But I do know Mitsubishi is offering free gas for a year. The research that I have done shows that Echo Boomers are even worse than me! Hot Topic to school, American Eagle at night. I am not even loyal to Sports equipment. I own Mission skates, use a GEAR stick, have TACKLA pants, Jofa leg guards, Itech shoulder pads, and Easton gloves. I buy what feels right to me…..I have no attachement to any brand. I think the next challenge in corporate america is how to make people loyal again. I need to love something for what it is, not because it was on sale…………… JK

Quick: Name the biggest SUV on the market. Odds are you said ‘Hummer’. GM has used the mammoth H1 and H2 to carve quite a niche for themselves in the SUV market in recent years. In a time of spiraling gas costs, GM flew in the face of conventional wisdom and launched the biggest line of SUVs ever. And they’ve made a killing doing so. GM now owns the “big freakin’ SUV” position in most consumers’ minds. Which makes their latest effort, the H3, even more peculiar. The newest model from Hummer is not only significantly smaller than its predecessors, it is being marketed to (gasp!) women! In a new print ad, the H3 is set against an oversized and empty orange background, with the tagline ‘Available in the petite section’, further impressing upon the consumer that the latest Hummer is much smaller than its big brothers. Somewhere, Al Ries is likely shaking his head. Now there’s certainly nothing wrong with women, and definitely nothing wrong with marketing to them. But as Mr. Ries was telling us over 20 years ago in the marketing classic Positioning, such line extensions rarely work. Mr. Ries claims that line extensions give short-term sales, in exchange for diluting the brand’s equity, long-term. A new Hummer that is smaller and aimed at women and new familes may appeal to this new market, but will it alienate the core market that the Hummer has built its brand name on? Auto analysts such as Forbes’ Dan Leinert thinks it may: ” The question is, of course, whether a smaller Hummer will sell. The original attraction of the H1 and H2 was their raw, overpowering size. To make a Hummer that is more like any other over-large SUV undermines the brand’s appeal.”. Time will tell. Sales for the new H3 are doing very nicely, but this follows the trend of most line-extensions enjoying strong sales initially. The true test will come after the ‘newness’ of the H3 wears off, and consumers realize that they are paying $10,000 more for the H3 than competitors such as the Nissan Xterra and Jeep Cherokee, and only getting 220 horsepower to move a 4700 lb beast.

McDonald’s has been trying to get rappers to incorporate the Big Mac into their songs, but haven’t quite gotten a a tune they’re happy with yet.

McDonald’s will pay artists as an incentive to produce a hit — paying artists from $1 to $5 every time their song is played on the radio.

Jesus, for that kind of money, I’ll start rapping. After being criticized for opening up the ninth circle of product placement hell by watchdog groups pointing out that rap fans may not know their musical heros are being paid to sing about particular fast food sandwiches, Mickey Dees came up with Mad Ave’s Hit Bullshit Clip of the Week:

“This is where brand relevance has gone and we have great confidence that the consumer understands this,” a spokesman said. “[Consumers are] cognizant of this as a placement in brand strategy. … We believe that the McDonald’s brand is so omnipresent already in America that having it in music, having it in TV, having it in movies, is no more intrusive than anything else children experience nowadays.”

Yes, I’m sure that’s true. They don’t understand where babies come from, but they are cognizant of brand strategy.

The Chevron corporation has started a new website, “Will you join us?” The site features articles and discussion boards on the world’s energy, environmental, and conservation issues. And “Will you join us” is supported by a new television campaign by Young & Rubicam New York, viewable here. One ad features scenes in Paris, where a strong breeze seems to have picked up. Newspapers and bowler hats are sent flying. And eventually a gigantic wind power turbine on the Eiffel Tower is revealed. A voiceover reads: “As a source of energy, wind power alone can’t do it all. Because just to power a city like Paris would take 20,000 turbines.” That’s right, folks! If the crazy environmentalists have their way, there will be giant fans on all of the world’s treasured monuments! Who wants to bet the original concept was a wind turbine sticking out of the Statue of Liberty’s nose? Another ad shows multitudes of baby carriages rolling through grasslands, savannahs, suburban streets, freeways, and by the Roman Coliseum and the Arc de Triomphe. And the voiceover reads, “In the next 20 years, the world will grow by 1.5 billion people. Feeding this appetite for energy will take innovation, collaboration, and conservation.” Nice thought, but the world’s population growth is exponentially higher in the developing world, which consumes far less energy than the developed world. So this ad distracts from the real question, which is how we can more intelligently meet the developed world’s voracious appetite for energy. I agree that our energy issues need to be solved by a combination of technological innovation and conservation. But Chevron’s spin and laughable scare tactics don’t fill me with confidence in their invitation for dialogue.

Maybe that’s my problem? I don’t have highlights in my hair. Or maybe its the lack of a vintage bomber jacket? No, no, I know: I’m not made of plastic.

It seems that even Barbie’s boy-toy Ken has managed to land himself a job as an Art Director. Producer Barbie must have had a connection at one of her client agencies.

For the hardcore collectors, Art Director Ken is available here.

Anyone in advertising knows…..current clients are more profitable than new clients. It seems the rest of the World cannot figure this out. I try so hard to be brand loyal, but it is impossible! Companies just do not get it……their first job is to keep current customers. Their second job is to get new one’s. Take care of the ones you have, and new ones will come. Example#1. I just moved up to PA from Maryland. Last week, I called my insurance company to notify them of the move, and to register my insurance in PA. When I recieved the quote, it was about $50 more than I was paying in the Old Line State. I told them I really wanted to stay with them, but I would have to get other quotes. They said that was the best quote that they could give me, becuase they entered everything in the computer, and that is the quote that I would have to live with. Not so much. I called around. I got a better quote. Although I recieved a better quote, I really wanted to stay with my current company, as I have been with them for ten years. I told them what my other quote was, and said, if you come close, I will stick with you. Keep in mind I am one of the rare no accident, great credit people. They said to me, we cannot, its in the computer, we cannot match that rate. I am dumbfoundfed how a company would just throw away a ten year customer who has been loyal, never has made a claim (maybe they know one is coming) just becuase a computer program told them so. I pay an average of $150 a month for car insurance for my wife and I. Being 27, I plan on paying at least $150 a month for 30 more years. That is a $54,000 customer that they just blew away. Do you know how much it will take in marketing and advertising to get me back? A heck of a lot more. Example #2 - Well, I only have one, but Example #1 really blows my mind. The lesson here is keep you current customers happy, becuase it will be more expensive to get new ones than to keep the current ones……. On a lighter note, I just saved a bunch of money by switching to….. JK

AdWeek is reporting that only a month after hiring CD Brian Friedrich, Lowe NY has announced the addition of two more creatives with BBH backgrounds. The team of writer Peter Rosch and art director John Hobbs will be moving to Lowe in the position of co-Executive Creative Directors. A third ECD slot will be filled by Fernanda Romano, a former interactive CD at DM9DDB.

How awesome is the new creepy Sprint spot?

Hotlanta has a lot of things going for it. Advertising isn’t one of them, Last night I had a conversation with a local CD. He was complaining about being trapped in a dead-end agency determined to never do anything cool. It’s a fairly common situation. Young turk makes it semi-good at a big time shop in a big time market, works his way up the ladder, collecting a Pencil or two on the way, then gets offered his own command at a small or smallish place in an “up and coming’ market like Atlanta. They roll into town, making good money, paying cheap rent, maybe have a kid or two, then realize they’re never going to win a Pencil again. I was at one of those AAAA seminar/martini parties a few years ago, during that golden age of Atlanta when there were three or four national stars running shops in town. There was a panel of the big guys sitting around answering questions like “How do you feel about digital cameras vs film?” and “Are you planning on incorporating interactive at your agency or will you continue to use outside resources?” Then some smart ass piped up with, “What’s the deal with Atlanta?” They all had things to say about the mystery of Atlanta’s inability to sustain a competitive agency. “Clients don’t think there’s any talent here.” “Talent doesn’t want to come here.” “The old boy network won’t open up.” “Clients are too conservative here.” Well, I’m sure there’s some of that. I know headhunters in New York that won’t even talk to agencies in Atlanta. I know clients that have nothing but contempt for their target audience. I know “rainmakers” that do nothing but play golf with their buddies all day. But there’s got to be more to it than that. There’s a lot of talent here. The guy I was talking to is one of the smartest guys I know. He’s worked on some kick ass accounts and got assloads of awards to show for it. And now he spends all day writing “Get more out of life with Mohawk Carpet®!” I don’t know what the problem is. There’s talent in this town. There’s money. There’s big, global potential clients here. If you were Coke, wouldn’t you like to get in your big black car and be driven 15 minutes down the street to meet with your agency? I mean, I know you make your peon drive his Saab down the street to the place that does the coupons so you get $10 off Six Flags tickets, but I mean your REAL agency. I don’t know. It’s a black hole. On a lighter note, you can put your logo on a bum now.

1 billion and counting. That’s the current amount of donations received for victims of Hurricane Katrina, according to an article in yesterday’s Washington Post. That total doesn’t include donations from last night’s episode of Monday Night Football, during which current and former NFL players took donations for the relief effort. Some estimates have the final total approaching 2 billion. Granted, roughly half of the donations thus far are from corporations. Still, that means over 500 million has been donated from everyday Americans in the three weeks since Katrina made landfall in Gulfport, Mississippi. When’s the last time a company released a new product to the market that had similar sales, with NO advertising? Then again, this is a rare case where little advertising is necessary. The appeal is easy to understand: Compassion for our fellow man. The benefit of the donations is obvious: Helping fellow Americans rebuild their communities, homes, and lives. Marketing professionals everywhere can learn much from the massive giving that’s coming in response to Katrina. If you have a product that people want, that they can clearly see the benefits of, and that fulfills a basic human need, it will sell itself. What ‘product’ is being sold here? Hope. We all need some of that.

What is it that all newly graduated ad school creatives have in common? No, I’m not talking about the disheartening period of unemployment after school, during which we learn that we’re not the greatest thing since the chocolate croissant. I’m thinking more of that moment when we realize we actually have to get a job with this book we’ve killed ourselves to create. And then the questions come rolling in. In step Janet Kestin & Nancy Vonk, or, less formally, “Jancy”. The two are co-Chief Creative Officers at Ogilvy, Toronto. Janet and Nancy pride themselves on their interest in, and nurturing of Junior creatives. For the past two years, the “Ask Jancy” column has been a web based resource for advertising questions of all sorts. That resource has now been reinforced by the opinions of some of the industry’s top minds and compiled into an easy to navigate book, Pick Me. Pick Me follows a logical progression through the life of an advertising creative, from school through the coveted CD position and even into retirement. Each chapter begins with commentary on the subject by Jancy, followed by a series of questions and answers about the issues that are usually clear only in hindsight. They are the most pertinent of the questions that have been posed by Ask Jancy readers over the past couple of years. Each chapters ends with the candid opinions of the big guns on these issues. Do names like David Droga, Sally Hogshead, and Chuck Porter ring any bells? All right, so I’ve pretty well drooled over this book. It must be perfect. Read this and you’ll land a job at any agency your heart desires, right? Close, but not quite. The book does demonstrate some contradictory ideas. Hey, what do you expect with the opinions of 16 different minds being offered up? This does mean, though, that you’ll have to read it with a mind of your own. Pick Me isn’t an instruction manual that can be followed for the assembly of the perfect job. Think of it more as some survival techniques for the industry wilderness. You’ll still have to pick which one is right for your situation. Simply put, Pick Me is a great resource for any young creative in the ad industry. If Hey Whipple… teaches us how to create ads, Pick Me is the sequel that explains what to do next. It should be handed out at every ad school graduation ceremony and read the next day (ok, maybe the day after that). Trust me. I was there not all that long ago.

So let me give this blogging thing a try. It is supposed to be trendy, right. I am a trendy person, or I try to be. I am a little behind the curve, never one to be an early adopter. I got my wife an ipod mini last week…..and right when I gave it to her we saw a commercial for the ipod nano. I am just a little behind. I guess my goal for this blog is to give it to you straight, from an account persons perspective. How do I deal with clients? What challenges do we face? Can we get along with creatives? I think so, and I think a lot of things. So let me start with this advice for any young person out there……trying to get into the business. Go grab your resume. Take a look at it. Now grab a Zippo and light it on fire. Next, call up your instructors who taught you how to put together a resume, and tell them they suck. Tell them they need to bring in HR people to guide their instruction. Then start your resume over…..and start with a sketch….what do you want it to look like? Then write down what is the goal of this resume. What is YOUR unique mission with this one piece of paper. After that is done, go to work. CREATE. Do not just fill white space. What, you have a college degree, right? Employers are going to swoon over your 3.5 GPA and swim team awards right? Wrong. I have seen so many dry, boring, BAD, resumes from kids fresh out of school that I have to think that it goes beyond kids just being lazy. What is really the cause is 60 year olds teaching kids how it was done 20 years ago. Times have changed. 20 years ago, a college degree meant something. A college degree put you in an elite crowd. Now, a college degree means nothing…..it’s what you do with it. So back to the resume, after you are done, read it over. Ask yourself, would I hire myself? If not, go back to step one. If you would, show it to someone you really do not like that much. Like your mom. Ask them to be honest. Give them a red pen. Take comments, and start over. If you really want to work in Account Service, please just keep this thought in mind when sending out your resume - 100 other people just sent in a resume for the same job. At that second. 20 are better than you. You are better then 20. The other 60 are about the same, same education, same stupid ass MS Word resume wizard template. HR throws way 20. Keeps the good 20. The other 60 go into filing. Your life, your four years of hard work just went on hold, because you did not make an effort to get to the top of the pile. I had a coffee today. Iced Grande 2% light Iced Latte. Without Starbucks, where would we really be? How is that for a first blog? I would call it a rant of sorts.